The Year Of Me: 2008

On December 31, 2007 I declared that 2008 would be the "Year of Me". I was going to quit smoking and once I was comfortable with that, focus on my weight. It was a tough few weeks, but on January 18, 2008 after being on Chantix for a week, I was able to quit. Chantix made it easy and I even went off of the medication before the 12 weeks because I felt confident that I was done with smoking forever.

In February, I started having weird coughing jags. I would cough and not be able to stop and that would turn into wheezing and lack of the ability to breathe. It happened to me two Fridays in a row.

In the meantime, I had a dream that my best friend from my childhood, Beth took me to a graveyard to see her mother's grave. She told me that her mom died of Breast Cancer. We went into the bathroom and I lifted up my shirt and there was a strip of darkened skin on my right breast. It was a very dark, yet clear dream. I spent about a week or so checking my breasts frantically until I found something. I thought I felt a lump under my right breast. My husband couldn't feel it but I was convinced it was there, so I went to the doctor.

March 3, 2008 I saw my doctor about said lump as well as the breathing problem. He couldn't feel a lump, but ordered an ultrasound anyway. He also gave me an inhaler and ordered a chest x-ray. He was sure that my breathing problem was due to all the tar breaking up in my lungs after smoking for 17 years, and I was pretty sure that was the problem too.

After my ultrasound, I talked to a doctor right away and he told me there was nothing there. I went upstairs for the chest x-ray and after about a week I got the card in the mail with the "normal" box checked. I have this x-ray report (along with all of my medical records now) and it states:

REPORT: The heart size and contour are normal and the lungs are free of infiltrates.

IMPRESSION: Normal chest

I let the breast thing go, but the breathing problems got worse and worse. I saw my doctor several times about my increasing need for the inhaler. One one occasion I even went there unable to breathe with my three kids in tow and they gave me a breathing treatment right in the office after checking my pulse ox, which was low. I had a pulmonary function test which was "normal". I also had recurring respiratory infections which required me to be on steroids in order to breathe. I got sick of going to the doctor for a band-aid so I sought out a Pulmonary doctor.

I work at a hospital so I decided to go to the head of the transplant team. I got a copy of my March x-ray and saw him on August 21, 2008. He reviewed my chest x-ray and showed me a "thickening" around my right lung, told me it was a pleural cap and "nothing to worry about". His visit note even states: "Included a review of a chest radiograph from 03/10/2008 which revealed some right pleural capping but otherwise unremarkable".

He told me I probably had asthma and that it can develop at any age. I was pretty pissed off since I quit smoking to be healthier and now I have asthma. He ordered another pulmonary function test along with a Methacholine challenge, in which they administer the drug via inhalation and if it irritates you, you have asthma. It irritated me. He prescribed Asmanex and I started it. It worked.

At the end September, I developed another respiratory infection with bronchitis. After being treated again with steroids, antibiotics, and Clarinex I was done with the respiratory shit.

The year was pretty much over and I hadn't been able to focus on myself like I had wanted to. I vowed that 2009 would be the "Year of Me".