Friday, November 5, 2010

And I Ask Myself...

...how did I get here? It's hard to face this part of my life right now. I have to choose between what I feel in my heart and what I think in my head is "right". Quite frankly, I'm tired of following my head and would love to just follow my heart for the first time in a very long time but I have more than just myself to think about.

I'm tired of being pulled in two directions. I'm tired of feeling like a shitty person. I wish I could get some insight as to the meaning of life.

How did I lose so much of myself? When did this all happen? Was it marriage? Becoming a mother? Becoming a mother of 3 kids in a 16-month period? Heartbreaks, disappointments, let-downs, job changes, staying at home, loss of friends, relationship changes? Cancer?

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